So, after taking a year off dating, sex and all things
romantic, I was super excited to get back in the game! I had all this new knowledge and
understanding that I couldn’t wait to put to work. Little did I know that there was so much
learning yet to be done. I equate it to studying
statistics in school, then getting a job and having to apply that learning in
the real world. There is still so far to
go! Mainly, I think you learn all the
things you don’t know.
Since August, I have been dating. It has been interesting. I had a little bit of a relapse into Girl
Brain while pursuing things with the first gentleman, the Russian. He and I had been working together and he
showed interest and was pretty insistent about chasing me, until I reciprocated
and then he disappeared and I dropped back into my normal patterns of obsessing
and chasing. That is, until The Blue
Fairy came up and talked me down. It was
a bad scene, but I got over quite quickly, faster than ever before and most
importantly, I could see it happening and knew it had to change. Nothing came of it. We were from different parts of the country
and we parted amicably. It wasn’t the
right relationship for me, but I was just so excited to be a participant in the
dating world instead of an observer, I lost all sense of myself (that, and I
was super horny, let’s face it!).
After that, I tried online dating. It was okay.
I was seeing one guy for a while, but we discovered that we were looking
for different things. I also learned a
bunch about how I need to go about forming a relationship with someone. I still have a lot of work to do on trust and
acceptance of kindness. When it comes to
forming a romantic relationship, I need to move at a pace slightly slower than
molasses on a cold winter’s day. I still
have training wheels on and was trying to ride a big-girl bike.
