Everything is good right now. Really good.
I am really working hard right now on staying focused in the present and
manifesting positive energy. That sounds
so wrong coming from me. I can hear past
versions of myself laughing at the hippie nonsense I’m spewing, but I’m on the
manifesting ship! Toot! Toot!
And I don’t mean only thinking positive. I mean taking away the negative self-doubt
that often leads to self-sabotage before you even try. I
am spending a lot of time on self-care and prioritizing self-care. Eating right, meditating, ritual, writing,
exercising. Who am I?! A big part of self-care is looking out for
all aspects of self: mind, body, heart, & soul. It takes a lot of time. Making time for it seems hard at first. In fact, I failed a lot. It has taken me nearly a year to actually
realize the importance of making these things a priority. Yet, it seems to yield positive results. Life has been pretty sweet and everything is
on an upswing.
This makes me nervous.
When life gets too good, I get anxious, as if I’m waiting for the other
shoe to drop. My big focus now is to steer
the conversation in my head away from that part that catastrophizes every
scenario, especially my love life. When
I feel myself start up that spiral, I need to exercise particular care. I need to concentrate on grounding all the
other aspects of myself to bring my mind back in check. When there is balance, there is clarity… and
peace.
I’ll use this time to ground my meditation and writing
practices. To organize my time so that
my self-care times become sacred. We
have lost the importance of honouring rituals.
We pay them no mind because they don’t fit well into our busy lives, but
they are the things that hold us on this Earth.
Without them, we drift away.
Making those few moments sacred to yourself, gives you worth. When you see your own worth, others can’t
ignore it. It ripples through the world.
This is what I mean by manifesting positive energy. You are a mirror and reflect whatever you
give. Therefore, when you make yourself
important to you, you become important to others. What I have learned repeatedly through my
therapy process is that the path that you can see, is rarely the one that leads
you to the outcome you desire. As the
fox says, “One sees clearly only with the
heart. Anything essential is invisible
to the eyes.” (Antoine de Saint-Exupéry)
